Archive for the ‘Bitsnark News & Reviews’ Category
Remembering – GUN (briefly)
Where were you in 2005? No seriously, where were you? Well, in November 2005 I was at home with my semi-trusty Xbox 360 playing the underrated GUN – an open world Western by Neversoft, the folks that made the Tony Hawk Pro Skater titles.
The Amazing Spider-Man 2 teaser is stuffed with stuff
They really need to come up with something a little fresher than The Amazing Spider-Man 2 don’t you think? I mean literally anything else will do. Well, nearly anything else. I don’t want to see ‘Rise of [insert villain]’ or whatever because, well, I’m all risen out and besides there are three bad guys in this movie that Petey Parker tangles with so it would be a crap shoot to see which one of them ends up in the subtitle.
Square-Enix announces Kingdom Hearts HD 2.5 ReMIX; due worldwide on PS3 in 2014
Doing what everybody hoped/knew they would do, Square-Enix has this morning officially announced Kingdom Hearts 2.5 ReMIX.
The compilation is due to release on PlayStation 3 sometime next year.
Three new Grand Theft Auto V trailers have been released – one for each asshole shitbag character that you get to play!
Like some sort of apocalyptic herald for servers all over the internet today, those cruel bastards over at Rockstar released not one, but three new trailers for its upcoming epic crime opus Grand Theft Auto V, with each covering one of the three characters that you’ll get to play when the game finally rolls around in September to say “So long and thank you for all the fish” to the current generation of home consoles.
Showcasing the escapades of the three playable scoundrels, Michael, Franklin and Trevor, the videos crucially give us a much more comprehensive insight into the open-world gameplay bliss that we can expect from Rockstar’s fifth core entry in the franchise that decked out all of their executives in posh suits and gave all their cats golden litter trays to shit in.
I mean just fucking look at it. It has a Queen soundtrack and everything.
Anyhow, you surely didn’t come here to see me wax bitterly about the fact that my moggies are disadvantaged at not having their own luxury shit pits and so it is that I present to you the latest gameplay footage from Grand Theft Auto V.
Tuck in and enjoy.
More Marvel Phase-Two goodness – Thor: The Dark World teaser arrives on earth
With Iron Man 3 due to hit flick rooms in the UK at the end of this week, it wouldn’t be an understatement to say that the appetite of the post-Avengers public for more Marvel goodness is at an all-time high.
Crashing down to earth then, so that it might mingle with us cretinous mere mortals is the first teaser trailer for the Thor: The Dark World.
It appears to spin an epic looking yarn all things told on this first, most meagre of impressions, but already the trailer has done two things right.
Firstly, its margainlised the involvement of Kat Dennings’ limp comic-relief character and secondly, its provides us with the horrendously awesome tease of a mightily disheveled Loki and Thor working together in the face of a common threat.
Speaking of that threat, we see little of Chris Ecclestone‘s main-event antagonist but we’re in early days folks. Early days.
I have to say though, that so far, this tickles my nerd twangs in some pretty obscene ways. What about you lot?
The Kick-Ass 2 red band trailer is gloriously stupid
The long-awaited red band trailer for Kick Ass 2 has finally violated the interwebs and as predicted, it exudes many different types of face-numbing awesomeness.
If you didn’t like the first one then you’re not going to like this one either because its safe to say that, tonally at least, the second film appears very similar to the 2010 original. And well, if you didn’t like the first film why the fuckity did you click on the link to this in the first place?
So yeah, it looks like more Kick-Ass with a wider cast which includes some added Jim Carrey.
Jim Motherfucking Carrey. Seriously, this could end up being his film; he looks like some sort of dirty, revelation. Top notch.
Anyway, enough of the froth, catch the trailer below fools:
Disney’s ‘Paperman’ short is a heartfelt gem
I’ve got a bit of a thing for animated shorts at the moment and so I find myself pretty lucky that Disney‘s Paperman has wondered into my domain.
Like Minkyu Lee‘s excellent Adam & Dog short, Paperman has also been nominated for best animated short film at this year’s 85th Academy Awards.
Telling a 1940’s love story in black and white with paper as a central theme, all the while blending traditional animation and computer graphics techniques, Paperman is nothing short of a wistful and charmingly brilliant revelation.
In fact, I dare say that there is more heart-felt emotion and characterisation on display here than in the majority of Dreamworks recent animated output.
Though I guess that’s not exactly a mean-feat or anything though is it?
Anyway, because I’m nice and not a toweringly evil bastard, I’ve linked the video for you to fawn over below.
Don’t forget to crank that sucker up to 1080p.
Paperman is currently nominated for Best Animated Short Film for the 85th Academy Awards and won Best Animated Short Subject at the 39th Annie Awards in 2012 (Adam & Dog won it the previous year in case you’re curious).
Minkyu Lee’s Adam and Dog animated short film is a triumph
I love animated shorts like this.
Minkyu Lee‘s Oscar nominated Adam and Dog is a compacted retelling of the Adam & Eve fable but with the titular slant of Adam making friends with ‘Dog’; the first of his kind seemingly.
Its modest fifteen minute run-time is over before you know it but within that quarter of an hour of retinal intercourse you’ll be exposed to some of the most gorgeously hand-drawn visuals you’ll have ever seen and a narrative tale that tugs on the heart-strings without its characters ever uttering a single word.
Turn off the lights, park your ass in your most comfortable seat and allow Lee to entrance you with one of the singularly best animated short films in recent memory.
Adam and Dog is currently nominated for Best Animated Short Film for the 85th Academy Awards and won Best Animated Short Subject at the 39th Annie Awards.
MMA News: UFC 157 Preview – Dan Henderson Vs Lyoto Machida
One of the more notable matches on February 23rd’s UFC 157 pay-per-view card is the one that pits wrestling brawler Dan ‘Hendo’ Henderson against Karate wunderkind Lyoto “The Dragon” Machida.
Because the match is likely to be a barn burner and also because I know you’re all just dying to hear me talk shit on the matter, I’m going to do an analytical breakdown thing of how each fighter could achieve victory in just over three weeks time.
There will also be a prediction of the match winner at the end, but read the rest of it first though eh? I’ll know if you don’t.
The rest of it is after the cut.
New Assassins Creed title due this year; new character, new setting, new button to press
During its call to stuffy-suit wearing investors who probably don’t give a rodent’s anus about videogames outside of how much paper it can make them, Ubisoft confirmed that not only would there be a new Assassins Creed title (I know right? The shock. Please, try to contain yourself) but that it would showcase an all-new character (sorry Connor, better luck next time… Oh wait.) in an all-new time-period.
For the sake of innovation you can also expect to press a new button too. Pressing ‘A’ after all is so 2007.
Anyhow, i’m somewhat eager to see what the new setting is. Personally, I think they should pull the trigger on a Japanese setting for the next game and have you play as a ninja, slitting the throats of fat feudal lords and styming your pursuers with caltrops and stuff.
It would be great. Maybe.
What setting do you think would be a natural fit for the next ‘Creed game?